Ask the Marshmallow: Family Matters

Kada:

What's one issue you're currently working on that you think you'll be able to bring up with your parents one day?

I'm currently working through this period of feelings I went through when I was a little kid and I enjoyed pain. Yeah that's right, I enjoyed pain, as a little kid, self mutilation like. Because of their segregative behaviour, I loved being in hospital, having wounds and ailments.

I'll need to write about this soon at one point, and I know that writing about these things act almost as a dress rehearsel for bringing it up with them. Keep your eyes peeled. (Actually, don't, that sounds painful.)

Kada: [this one asked quite a few questions, she did!]

What's something you'd love to be able to say to your extended family relatives that you hope you'll have the opportunity to say one day?

Quite honestly? Something I'd love to be able to say is "Oh FUCK OFF."

I have plenty of opportunities to say it, though I think biting my tongue might be just a tad less controversial.

I know I can't work with them the way that I can work with my Mum and Dad. They make their fly-by rude comments constantly, and I highly doubt they'll remember how they've insulted their closest offspring, never mind me.

What might have more of a significant impact rather than 'oh fuck off' might be 'No, I don't have to.' Every time they insult me with an inadequacy of mine and make 'friendly suggestions' on how to improve myself, I can say, 'No, I don't have to.'

If they say if I lose weight I can get a better job, I can say, "No, I don't have to." If I lose weight then I can get a husband, I can say, "No, I don't have to." If I lose weight then I can have babies(?!), I can say, "No, I don't have to.", rather than nodding and arguing with them inside my head.

boobsihazthem:

Your current workout regimes seem extremely intense. I've been exercising for about 4 months, and I've gone through your archives to 2006 and found that you started in a very similar way. How long did it take you to ramp up the exercise to current levels? How did you get into the running, specifically?

When I started exercising, I was focusing on getting 10,000 steps a day with regard to walking. Then, I shifted to exercise DVDs, because I could do them in inside my house, curtains drawn, at night, where noone could see me. Then, my friend Sarah-I and I started going for weekly walks after she moved to Auckland. I'd known her for years, and we had even done Weight Watchers and Body For Life together through the intarwebs. I knew she understood how I felt.

It was after reading about Body Pump on Dietgirl, and finding that my local Les Mills was having Open Weekends that Sarah-I and I tried our first Body Pump class. From there, that was when the exercise levels began to intensify. I joined the gym, and attended Body Jam. I had never had so much fun with exercise before, and the highlight of my week became doing Body Jam classes.

As for the running? I never joined the gym with a view to begin running. When I joined, I got a complimentary session with a personal trainer - Adam. I initially thought I would just have the complimentary session with him, then go it alone. Do all the Body Jam I liked. But he said something which got me thinking. He said to me, with regard to my lifestyle, "You're not special." I had no special reason for maintaining an unhealthy lifestyle. I signed him on as my trainer. It's been about 1 and a half years that I've been training with him.

One day, with a session with him, I was on the treadmill. He said, "Guess what, we're going to run!", and he increased the speed before I had a chance to object. I couldn't believe that I was running! It must've been for a paltry 30 seconds at the time, but I couldn't manage anywhere near that before then. 30 seconds became 1 minute. Became 2 minutes, 5 minutes, 10 minutes.

Still, at this stage, it was just running as part of my interval training. It wasn't running for distance, for time, or anything. I had 8 minutes of cardio between each set of strength training, and the best way to challenge myself was to run.

When Worker Jay suggested that we do a triathlon together, THAT was when the running started. I had to run for 4km, and I had someone to be accountable to - Worker Jay.

So as you can see, most of the way I became embroiled in exercise at the level which I do it has been down to one thing. Chance. Chances that I perhaps would've passed over before. This time, I'm taking them, and that's what is making the difference.

I'm certain that there's going to be even more chances to come, and I'll continue to take them.

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So that's this instalment of 'Ask the Marshmallow Anything'. To those who had your questions answered, I hope I did them justice!